Wrestlemania 34

Happy Wrestlemania (WM) week everyone and happy birthday to me, and what better way to celebrate the big day than by doing my annual write up of the prior year’s ‘showcase of the immortals.’ Wrestlemania 34 (WM34) gets the dubious honor of being WWE’s sole 2018 BluRay release in North America due to the declining sales of the home video market. In my entry on last year’s BluRay I chastised it for skipping out on the usually included pre-show matches. For the WM34 BluRay, WWE heard the feedback and included all three pre-show matches……..but decided to cut the usually included Hall of Fame ceremony, and once again save on budget costs and skimp out on subtitles two years in a row! Shame!

I would have been furious for WWE cutting out the Hall of Fame ceremony from the BluRay, especially since two of my all-time favorites Mark Henry and Bill Goldberg were inducted last year and both delivered tremendous speeches in addition to the Dudleyz having a surprisingly fun acceptance speech courtesy of D-Von’s late discovery of humor, but last year’s ceremony will be notorious for having the Hillbilly Jim induction. Hillbilly Jim got the HoF spot usually reserved for fun opening act talent to come out and have a few laughs and share a few career highlight moments and be out of there before you know it while getting the crowd started up for the rest of the night, much like an actual opening match. I was originally looking forward to Jim’s speech because I recall him being the only highlight on Legends House with his affable light-hearted levity in that train wreck of a show. Instead, Mr. Jim had the longest speech of the night at nearly 35 minutes where he meticulously laid out his entire career and droned on about his action figure payday.

Because of Jim’s speech I found myself surprisingly gracious WWE excluded it this year, and I can always watch Henry’s and Goldberg’s speeches on the Network or YouTube. WWE had key excerpts from Henry’s speech in an excellent retrospective they recently put on the network you can check out by clicking here, so watch that instead. The DVD version of WM34 includes a code for a digital copy of the HoF ceremony, but since that is absent from the BluRay version being covered here, and for my own sanity, we will be omitting my usual Hall of Fame coverage. There is a good substitute bonus feature for the HoF, but we will get to that in a bit.

The trio of kickoff matches for WM34 featured both the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal and first ever Fabulous Moolah Memorial WM Women’s Battle Royal. The men’s match sadly saw Jim Ross’s and Jerry Lawler’s only commentary for the night. It paled to previous year’s editions with only a few notable eliminations like Ryder getting pounced out by Mojo. The end saw Bray Wyatt return after an absence from his ‘Ultimate Deletion’ match with Matt Hardy only to join forces with him here and help him win the Andre cup! The women’s royal featured half the participants padded out with NXT and Performance Center filler. It had an awful clunky beginning that dragged on and the only spot of note from it was the ending that transpired in the middle of Sasha’s and Bayley’s hard-to-watch rivalry where Bayley instantly turned on Sasha and disposed of her. She was then stunned by Naomi’s presence and essentially laid down for her so she could easily eliminate her in a head-shake inducing moment of the night to emerge the winner of the….curvy hip trophy. The women delivered a far superior battle royal effort at the Evolution PPV later in 2018 that told a fantastic story beginning to end so watch that instead. The cruiserweight title match between Cederic Alexander and Mustafa Ali was the sole highlight of the WM Kickoff. Ali debuted his glowy Sub-Zero-esque ring attire here, and the bout told a gripping narrative of the two representing the heart and soul of the 205 division. After some intense near-falls, Alexander walked out victorious after hitting his Lumbar Check finisher.

Onto the main card, it opened with what turned out to be the best pure match of the night with the Intercontinental title triple threat between Miz, Seth Rollins and Finn Balor. I completely forgot about the Miz-tourage until I saw them here. Unlike a lot of other triple threats, there were rarely any lulls here and several near-falls that got the crowd rocking with the highlight being Finn breaking up a pin with his Coup de Gras. Ultimately, Seth won the title after hitting his Stomp for the pin. The SmackDown Women’s Title was on the line next that saw Charlotte Flair end Asuka’s record-setting undefeated streak. I recall being stunned at this outcome as Asuka had a ton of momentum at the time and following a couple equally bummer losses to Carmella on the following PPVs she has never really recovered. She got a paper champion reign recently where she was rarely seen on TV throughout it until she suddenly dropped the title to, surprise, Charlotte. Despite it being a great WM match for the women, I will remember this as being the beginning of the end for Asuka.

So in-between WM33 and 34, believe it or not Jinder Mahal got a half year title reign as WWE Champion and WWE will tell you it was not because he got suddenly jacked while they were trying a hard market push into India. Mahal lost the title a few month prior, but he got a nice consolation prize leaving WM34 the new US champion in a Fatal Four Way match between him, Randy Orton, Bobby Roode and Rusev in a solid, but forgettable match-up. Speaking of forgettable multi-person title matches, the SmackDown tag title triple threat between the Usos, New Day and Bludgeon Brothers fit that billing in what was a showcase for the on-the-rise Bludgy Bros. Unfortunately, the Bludgies specialize in plodding, big-man offense that did not capture this WM crowd when they eventually hit their top-rope powerbomb on Kofi to win the titles. The Bludgeon Brothers eventually evolved into a decent team and were starting to have some seriously good matches by Summerslam, but then Luke Harper suffered an ill-timed injury and the team was forced off TV. On a quick aside, I will give my sympathies to the Usos have only wrestled on WM entirely in pre-show matches for nearly a whole decade before finally making their primary WM card debut here to only lose the tag titles in a quick get-it-over with match.

What was not forgettable transpired next to be my overall best match of the night. While the IC title match was the best ‘pure’ wrestling match, the mixed tag between Triple H & Stephanie McMahon against Kurt Angle & Ronda Rousey had the unbeatable combination of great charisma, energy, wrestling, action and moments to produce an enthralling encounter I did not foresee to be anywhere near this entertaining. The huge X Factor going in was how good would Ronda Rousey be in her WWE debut, especially with only several weeks training going in and reports of her training at the WWE Performance Center being curtained off so no one could see or take video. Rousey surpassed all expectations and premiered a WWE star-making effort as soon as she tagged in. Steph was tremendous in playing Ronda’s foil in sneak attacks and begging for mercy. Ronda was exceptional with her ruthless offense on Steph and even a memorable encounter with Triple H. Props to the announcers who accentuated the match with classic calls by Corey Graves like ‘call the cops’ as soon as Ronda was tagged in and on the precipice of unleashing her fury. I vividly recall going nuts along with the crowd throughout this match with all the big moments that played out in a brilliantly booked match-up that saw Rousey & Angle win when Rousey made Steph tap to her armbar.

The much anticipated match between John Cena and Undertaker happened next and I am still trying to make sense out of it a year later. This has been a longtime WM dream match, but it featured an awkward TV buildup with Cena repeatedly calling out the Undertaker to answer his challenge on TV for several weeks only to have no response back. Cena then said he would enjoy WM in the crowd with the fans and did just that and partook in some brewskis with the fans for the first five matches before an official informed him that Undertaker was in the building. Cena darted to the back to prep up and came out at this point ready for the ‘Taker, but ‘Taker once again did not show. Eventually acoustic-savant Elias came out and sang a diddy trashing Cena until John heard enough and sent Elias packing. Cena was about to leave the arena until the trademark gong hit and eerie special effects occurred with a nice nod to the end of WM33 which was where we last saw the Dead Man. A perplexed Cena ran to the ring for the now official match…..and was promptly ‘routed’ (as Cole appropriately called) by Undertaker in less than three minutes before succumbing to the Tombstone in a one-sided match that was all Undertaker. I know Cena has been focusing more on Hollywood efforts and Undertaker is especially up there in years and perhaps this quick match was all his cardio was capable of. That was what I thought anyways until Undertaker delivered fleshed out matches later on in the year at both Saudi Arabia shows, so ultimately I have no idea why this match turned out like this. One day I hope we get interviews from both Cena and ‘Taker filling us in on what the hell happed that determined the match play out this way. That said, both individuals are mysteriously absent from the WM35 card, and if ‘Taker winds up not on the show it would be his first time missing WM since 2000. With WM35 already ridiculously overbooked currently at 15 matches, I still would not mind seeing another impromptu chapter play out between these two in someway this Sunday.

Next up was the obligatory roll call for the previous night’s HoF inductees. Mysterious by his absence was celebrity wing inductee Kid Rock (though a couple of his songs were played throughout the night as the official WM34 theme songs). I could not help but chuckle at an off-handed backstage comment by Goldberg earlier in the night from the WWE 24 special on WM34 where Goldberg stated he intentionally showed up a few hours past his expected call time to avoid idle boredom. What was not a chuckling matter was Daniel Bryan overcoming WWE doctors’ three year ban on him from competition to wrestle again in a WWE ring. His long overdue return saw him tagging with Super Shane-O Mac to take on Amazing French Canadians 2.0 Kevin Owens & Sami Zayn. I am still shocked to see Shane McMahon compete here considering within the preceding month he survived a helicopter crash and suffered a hernia he postponed surgery on so he could make his WM and Saudi Arabia paydays. Shane played the partner-in-peril to perfection building up to the white-hot reaction for Bryan returning with fire hitting all his vintage moves, and somehow Shane was able to recuperate and pull off his Coast to Coast too. Eventually Bryan hit his running knee for the feel-good win of the show.

WWE tried to build up the RAW Women’s Title match as another feel-good moment of overcoming bullying between Nia Jax and Alexa Bliss. It was difficult to convey this though because until a few weeks before Nia’s whole shtick for her near two years on WWE TV was using her size advantage to bully others, and all of a sudden cameras picking up on Alexa disparaging Nia’s size one time was suppose to get everyone sympathetic for Nia. It did not click and it resulted in a weak reaction for this despite both putting in a considerable effort for a good match that saw Nia win the title with a Samoan Drop from the middle turnbuckle. It did not help matters that within several weeks Nia was back to being a villain again so Rousey could have a metaphorical monster to slay (in all seriousness, Nia legit gels with Rousey and so far this past year I feel Rousey’s best matches have been with Nia) in her quest for gold.

Another disappointing match followed between AJ Styles and Shinsuke Nakamura for the WWE Title. I recall getting burnt out and in desperate need of a break at this point in the night of my original viewing and was hoping it held up better second time around. That was not the case, as the bout had a good initial chapter, but the two rarely got out of second gear until the closing minutes of the contest where things really amped up. It was a little better watching this with a fresh set of eyes, but not much and a far cry from their epic NJPW encounter at the beginning of 2016. Shinsuke’s heel turn though was well executed and fun to relive where he could not handle defeat and therefore delivered his first of many to come low blows to ‘The Phenomenal One.’

Re-watching the following RAW tag titles match next though with a fresh set of eyes was interesting where everyone wondered who the hell Braun Strowman would pick to be his tag team partner against Cesaro and Sheamus. I had no idea either and thought WWE would resort to a retired legend or celebrity and was taken aback when Braun wandered the crowd aimlessly before settling on a ‘fan’ in the form of a middle schooler going by Nicholas who later on was revealed to be the referee of the match’s son. This was the perfect placement for this type of match because I was in serious need of levity and needed something like this to recharge me for the remainder of the night. I got a kick when Braun tagged in Nicholas briefly for an awkward eye contact moment with Cesaro before Braun quickly tagged back in and finished him off with his powerslam to make Nicholas the youngest ever tag team champion....until they had to relinquish them the next night due to Nicholas’s school obligations. Turns out Corey Graves was correct when he had the line of the night upon their victory when exclaiming “Doesn’t he have Algebra and stuff?”

As bizarre and befuddling as the John Cena/Undertaker match was, I was doubly befuddled at the conclusion of the main event Universal title match between Roman Reigns and Brock Lesnar. The crowd was dumping on this match throughout with nasty chants and eventually having more interest in executing the wave. Brock had a prolonged beatdown on Roman which saw a total of 10 overhead/german suplexes and six F5s. It was reminiscent of the Summerslam 2014 throttling of John Cena. I (and the crowd) felt the beatdown on Roman was foreshadowing Roman ‘hulking up’ for the eventual win. Every Roman kickout lead to more and more boos because presumably I/they did not want another rah-rah Roman win to end WM. Roman took some nasty blows from Brock to open him up BAD as he was gushing all over the ring that was the catalyst for his comeback until he was caught with a sixth and decisive F5 from Brock for the abrupt end to the match that I think no one saw coming and I am still scratching my head over. A big part of me was relieved when it happened, but another part was shocked that WWE pulled the trigger on that finish. Even more jaw-dropping to me is when watching the aforementioned WWE 24 special on WM34 that shows after the match Brock emerging backstage and giving the cold shoulder walk past Vince and literally tossing the championship he could not care a single iota about directly onto Vince’s lap and Vince yelling at him ‘YOU ASSHOLE’ to Brock’s back. I know I always heard Brock is only there for his limited days for the big-money contract and keeps to himself, and seeing his genuine not give a damn reaction to Vince and the rest of the staff was a real eye opener. I will still root and cheer for Brock and his unique style he brings to his matches , but damn was this a way to end WM with the rare occasion where a heel left WM champion.

I mentioned earlier WWE had a decent alternative to the HoF as extra features on the WM34 BluRay. That came in the form of the entire day-after RAW and a couple key moments from the next SmackDown. The entire RAW was just over two hours since there are no commercials. I am not going to recap the whole thing here, but it was cool reliving it for the raucous WM-weekend crowd and the expected NXT call-ups that debuted that night and looking back on the past year to see how far they have come. This was a nice substitute to the HoF, and as much as I jest about being relieved it was left off this year, I do hope the HoF is included in next year’s BluRay. Overall, I would have to give WrestleMania 34 a thumbs in the middle. Of the 14 matches only four of them are must-see (205 title, IC triple threat, Mixed Tag, RAW Women’s title) and a few matches underperformed/disappointed. Add to the fact the bonkers nature of the Cena/Undertaker and Universal title matches and it tallies up to a WM that can be best to jump around to the key moments of.

Past Wrestling Blogs

Best of WCW Clash of Champions
Best of WCW Monday Nitro Volume 2
Best of WCW Monday Nitro Volume 3
Biggest Knuckleheads
Bobby The Brain Heenan
Daniel Bryan: Just Say Yes Yes Yes
DDP: Positively Living
Dusty Rhodes WWE Network Specials
ECW Unreleased: Vol 1
ECW Unreleased: Vol 2
ECW Unreleased: Vol 3
Eric Bishoff: Wrestlings Most Controversial Figure
Fight Owens Fight: The Kevin Owens Story
For All Mankind
Goldberg: The Ultimate Collection
Impact Wresting Presents: Best of Hulk Hogan
Its Good to Be the King: The Jerry Lawler Story
The Kliq Rules
Ladies and Gentlemen My Name is Paul Heyman
Legends of Mid South Wrestling
Macho Man: The Randy Savage Story
Memphis Heat
NXT Greatest Matches Vol 1
OMG Vol 2: Top 50 Incidents in WCW History
OMG Vol 3: Top 50 Incidents in ECW History
Owen: Hart of Gold
RoH Supercard of Honor 2010-Present
ScoobyDoo Wrestlemania Mystery
Scott Hall: Living on a Razors Edge
Sting: Into the Light
Straight Outta Dudley-ville: Legacy of the Dudley Boyz
Straight to the Top: Money in the Bank Anthology
Superstar Collection: Zach Ryder
TLC 2017
TNA Lockdown 2005-2016
Top 50 Superstars of All Time
Tough Enough: Million Dollar Season
True Giants
Ultimate Fan Pack: Roman Reigns
Ultimate Warrior: Always Believe
War Games: WCWs Most Notorious Matches
Warrior Week on WWE Network
Wrestlemania 3: Championship Edition
Wrestlemania 28-Present
The Wrestler (2008)
Wrestling Road Diaries Too
Wrestling Road Diaries Three: Funny Equals Money
Wrestlings Greatest Factions
WWE Network Original Specials First Half 2015
WWE Network Original Specials Second Half 2015
WWE Network Original Specials First Half 2016
WWE Network Original Specials Second Half 2016
WWE Network Original Specials First Half 2017